I feel lost lately, thinking about suicide again. advice?

I've been through a LOT of the same crap, and realize that you are SOSOSO strong for picking yourself up and moving on throughout all of this. The majority of people don't exactly realize how great they have it, and the fact that you have pushed yourself to get through this proves that you are grateful. I know that losing friends sucks. I don't have any, to be honest. A couple of months ago my 'friends' accused me of being 'stingy' because I didn't give them cigarettes every time they asked for one ( Which is all the time, every second of the day ). They were literally screaming at me and pointing out every flaw I have known to name. I realized that I was stupid enough to let them use me. I was always the one to pay for the drugs, I always put them first. Anyway, ( sorry for getting off topic! ) you can't do this! You are such a strong person and there are so many ways that you can turn your life around. I know, it sucks being a teenager, and you feel like theres no way out and nowhere to go. I'm there too. But in reality, you can do anything if you put your heart into it. Stop being so hard on yourself, you don't give yourself enough credit as a person. Your mother needs you, and I'm sure others do too, even if they don't realize it. I know that this might not be very helpful, but if you need to talk, please email me! itsfunkytime@yahoo.com.